Tag Archives: Lenormand

Killing the Glad Girl

There is a scene early in the film Red Dust where Clark Gable goes to toss a drunk worker at his rubber plantation into bed, and discovers that Jean Harlow has taken up residence there. She kicks the drunk to the floor, and the exchange goes like this:

Harlow: You’re not going to leave the corpse here?
Gable: It’s his room. Didn’t you know?
Harlow: Honest I didn’t. I just took the first room the houseboy showed me. Oh, please you guys. This place is full of lizards and cockroaches as it is.
Gable: One more won’t hurt. Come on, lets have it. Who are you? Where’d you come from?
Harlow: Don’t rush me, brother. I’m Pollyanna, the Glad Girl.

She means it sarcastically – she’s a stranded hooker (yet the most ethical and compassionate character in the movie. It’s a great film.) And I was intrigued by what it was referring to – a Depression-era advertising shill? Some cartoon lady who was glad because her floors were shiny, or her dishes were super clean? So I googled.

It turned out that “Pollyanna the Glad Girl” is regular old Pollyanna, the eternal optimist. She’s pathologically optimistic.

From wikipedia:
“The title character is Pollyanna Whittier, an eleven-year-old orphan who goes to live in the fictional town of Beldingsville, Vermont, with her wealthy but stern and cold spinster Aunt Polly, who does not want to take in Pollyanna but feels it is her duty to her late sister. Pollyanna’s philosophy of life centers on what she calls “The Glad Game,” an optimistic and positive attitude she learned from her father. The game consists of finding something to be glad about in every situation, no matter how bleak it may be. It originated in an incident one Christmas when Pollyanna, who was hoping for a doll in the missionary barrel, found only a pair of crutches inside. Making the game up on the spot, Pollyanna’s father taught her to look at the good side of things—in this case, to be glad about the crutches because she did not need to use them.”

It’s all well and good to find some little silver lining in a bad situation. But to paint the whole thing with a broad brush and say it’s a positive – NO. If your partner punched your teeth out, I hope you wouldn’t say that they were a bit crooked or stained anyway, and now you can get some lovely caps. I hope you wouldn’t stay with him and hope to win him over and mend his ways with your “positive attitude”, the way Pollyanna did her creepy old aunt in the book. Would a qualified therapist tell you to do that? No, they’d try to get it into your head that you need to GTFO.

That book is from an era when kids weren’t supposed to feel sad, or angry, or disappointed, they were supposed to SHUT UP. Fred Rogers grew up in that era, and he dedicated his life to countering the idea and telling kids that it’s OK to FEEL things. I highly recommend the documentary “Won’t You Be My Neighbor?” You can rent it on amazon prime for a pittance – about $2.99. Here’s Mr. Rogers winning over a hardassed senator who was all set to refuse him funding. I think Senator Pastore was raised with similar rules, and he could relate:

A majority of people here in the US are uninsured, or underinsured, and can’t afford quality, certified counseling or therapy. So people seek out reassurance from readers, aspiring readers, bad readers, all kinds of readers, in card reading communities. Often free, from new readers trying to gain experience, from incompetent readers, from readers following the lead of others. The good, seasoned readers are outnumbered by the bad ones, and people will cherry pick what they want to hear, anyway. And this phony reading is becoming normalized. It’s not difficult to find articles like this one https://www.dailydot.com/irl/tarot-cards-facebook/

Reassurance is not therapy. Therapy is, by all accounts, HARD. People who tell you everything will be OK and you’re doing the right thing (even if you aren’t) are not therapists. We’re venturing into pathological things like co-dependence and denial here.

I’m here to tell you that you’re better off with NO treatment that with BAD treatment.

Card reading – real card reading – is predictive fortunetelling. We don’t pretend to fix people or “make everything all better.” When asked what the cards say, we interpret them – AS IS. Death or the Coffin are endings, not “transformation”.

We’re living in time-space, and that means loss sometimes. Think back to your past. Even if you made it to this point without being truly, horribly abused in any way, you’ve experienced pain. People die, pets die, bad things happen sometimes. That’s just the way life is, it HURTS, and we need to acknowledge that, not stick our heads in the sand and go “LA LA LA LA LA – NOT LISTENING!”

I can’t reassure anybody that everything will be OK without lying. “Everything” is NEVER OK. But this lowlife fortuneteller (with about as much respectability as Harlow’s hooker Vantine in Red Dust), can do everything in her power to Keep It Real. It’s helpful – I rely on reading for myself, and my clients say that they’re helped by readings – but it’s NOT therapy.

The only thing it has in common with actual therapy is that it acknowledges when something is wrong.

If you really feel called to become a counselor, here are the requirements to be licensed in your state. “Owning a Tarot deck and practicing on the internet” is not one of them. https://careersinpsychology.org/how-to-become-a-licensed-counselor/

A 2020 election reading

This is a reading I did on facebook recently, on the fly. I will quote it here as is, neither adding to it nor editing:

“September 16 at 1:42 AM

It’s early yet, but I’ve done early pulls on elections before and they’ve worked. All of my election pulls have been correct except 2016, and the fault in that one was the way I worded the question – Hillary DID win the popular vote, and that’s what the cards reflected.

Even as sick as everybody is of Trump, the GOP is encouraging more Russian interference. And a lot of the Berners are being pissy and threatening to once again sit this one out, or worse yet, vote Trump if Sanders doesn’t get the nomination. So I threw some cards to see what the actual results/aftermath of the next election will be, and ugh, there’s some nasty ones here.

Boundaries of the spread are Tree + Mice, failing health (hmmmm….) and Stork + Birds. Stressful change, but maybe an older couple moves? Let’s look at the inner diamond and see what will happen.

Snake + Anchor + Clouds + Man + Coffin. It’s too early to say who the Snake is. (Warren? I’d be OK with Warren.) Whoever she is, she’s not going away. (Anchor). Trouble (Clouds, and if you use the dark side, it’s definitely facing the Man) for Trump, and there’s the good old Coffin, the end, finis.

So even if they rig this one, we won’t be getting 8 years of this shit. It won’t be a pleasant time (all those nasty cards) but one way or another, he’s out. Maybe he’ll literally croak. You’re all invited for cocktails at my house if that happens.”

What’s interesting is that I got comments from other readers who are getting essentially the same thing – nasty cards around Trump, and a woman who contributes to taking him out. None of us know for sure who she is yet, but she’s apparently very real.

I could parse this further, but I think I’ll just let the reading stand as is and see “which way the cat jumps”.

Until then, I leave you with this song:

“Hey now, hey now
Don’t dream it’s over
Hey now, hey now
When the world comes in
They come, they come
To build a wall between us
We know they won’t win…”

What are you guys getting? Leave me a comment!

Finding a Lost Object with Lenormand

I misplaced a pocket knife the other day.

It’s just a little toothpick-style Buck, it’s inexpensive, and I have others. But it’s the kind of thing I use for a lot of little jobs, and I miss it again and again when I don’t have it.

It had to be in the house somewhere. I searched the room where I last used it (the kitchen, where I’d opened something with it), and the little box in my bedroom where I keep it handy, along with a couple of heavy-use decks and a bit of jewelry. Nothing.

So I pulled the three cards shown above, asking “Where is my Buck toothpick knife?” I didn’t preselect any cards (though I suppose you could do a Lost Man using the Scythe for a pocket knife), I just wanted something small and clear. The key to using the cards to find a location in your house is simplifying everything: keep the spread small and uncomplicated, and remember that the interpretation is often literal, or almost literal. It’s so simple, it can be tricky. I’ve seen that time and time again.

The simplicity of this type of reading is my reason for posting it. People post these lost object readings all the time, but I really wanted to underline how they need to be pared down to a very basic interpretation. It’s not like reading on most other subjects. It’s more like the cards are trying to show you a little snapshot of the location.

My first thought was the kitchen. Clover could be the little african violets on the windowsill, and Bear sometimes relates to food – but it tends to be absorption rather than cooking, and besides, I’d already searched the kitchen. So I turned my full attention to the center card, the Bear.

The only literal bear thing here is a teddy bear that my grandson left. It’s on a high shelf where my dog can’t reach it, awaiting his return. The shelf is in a room I use for storage. I installed a closet pole under it, and I have some dresses hanging there.

Then I remembered: I wore a flannel dress for a short trip to the store the other day. I changed into an older dress when I got home, since I had housework to do. The flannel was still clean – I only had it on for about 30 minutes – so I hung it back up.

The flannel dress was hanging almost directly below the teddy (Bear). It was in between a red dress (Heart) and a green dress (Clover). And the knife was in the pocket.

A flowing narrative about a brief romantic encounter with a burly man (or minor luck for your beloved mother, if you read the Bear as female), or a love of high finance and a little luck playing the market, or whatever, is appropriate in certain contexts. But forget all that when you can’t find something. Sometimes a heart is just red, clover is just green, and a bear is just a bear.

Lenormand Has Served Me Well (& two new decks)

Hello all – I’m here to discuss cartomantic simplicity. It may be seeing a minor renaissance.
Caitlin Matthews has a new book , Untold Tarot: The Lost Art of Reading Ancient Tarots, and Toni Puhle’s review of it really drives the point home.

Some of us are “system readers”, meaning we have meanings for each card and rules for when the cards fall in certain positions. This has always been called “traditional” reading, which has spawned many, many internet fights with people who try to say that tradition is frozen in time and outdated (it isn’t). But in any case, “system reader” is a good descriptor and I give props to Toni for it.

Even the Crowley Thoth can be read in that manner. After all, you have to remember the paths, elemental dignities, etc. (Which I am no wiz at, as my memory appears to be stuffed already. But I can see the beauty and incisiveness of the Thoth – as a system reader.

There is much discussion, nit picking, and hair splitting on internet forums, facebook, etc. over details in the Tarot – is the man walking away on the RWS Six of Cups leaving the past behind? Etc. It all seems irrelevant to me. Waite’s PKT gives a nostalgic interpretation. Crowley (who spilled the s00per seKrit Golden Dawn meanings, lol) simply calls it “Pleasure”. Who actually gives a f*** about that guy walking away?

That brings us to – well, everything else.

,

What is happening here? Do we need all manner of esoteric noise?

No. There is a brunette woman (me) who is catching flack from coworkers, but she’s staying on top of it.

Cards are actually very simple. Don’t overthink them. 😉

Petit Oracle des Dames bridge sized edition available here The Cartomancer

Another deck I want to mention is Patrick Valenza’s Oracle of Black Enchantment, the latest installment in the Mildred Payne cycle.

Like all of Valenza’s decks, it reads flawlessly right out of the box – eloquent, is this not?

(Look at that mess. I do need to mind my P’s and Q’s, lol)

The crazy thing is that Valenza has stated that he doesn’t read. But all of his decks have that precision, like they were designed by a constant reader.

The OBE is available here Deviant Moon Inc.

Anyway, my card reading philosophy is rooted in Lenormand and Kipper. (A man is a man, unless context absolutely doesn’t allow. He’s not “qualities you should take on”, or “advice”, he’s a person. Yes, I started with Tarot, but it took Lenormand and Kippers to show me what cartomantic precision actually is! I don’t fault Tarot itself, I fault modern reading styles.) Approach things that way, and the answers are right in front of you. *wink*

A Night Off With Mr. Ensslin and Mr. Wirth

…and Mr. Vodka and Mr. Tequila. So I will loosen up and talk about a sector of my life I don’t talk about much.

What is a Tarot but Majors and Minors? And what are Minors, but Pips? The Lenormand, arguably, is a reduced Pip deck.

The Majors speak in great depth, they resonate with Kabbalah/Qabalah, elemental dignities, Hebrew letters, gematria…but the Minors tell us about the world here below, what generally concerns us. “Will he ask me out?” “Is my job secure?” “Will my parcel arrive?”

But the most incisive, to-the-point Pip deck I have encountered is Lenormand.

I know that noobs want to shuffle everything together and read them in “intuitive” combinations. I am not suggesting that anyone do that. Oh HELL no.

But from what I understand, Continental readers lay the Majors and Minors out separately. The Majors for the deep, causative stuff, and the Minors for how it’s all effecting us here on the “meat wheel” (thank you, Mr. Kerouac*. You were a goddamn wino, but I love you for this. And On The Road. You crazy genius motherfucker. RIP.)

So, what better layout than a good old Majors-only Wirth, and a few Lenormand cards?

I asked about my (non-reading, it takes several streams of income to pay the bills these days, sadly. Oh, how I wish I was June Cleaver!) job. I can see things going wacky there. We make computer automotive parts (like those things that beep when you back up and there’s something you’re going to hit.) My line puts shock absorber pads on the metal shields that hold the little circuit boards.

It’s all crazy now because we have seven lines that build these units, but our line that supplies them is being cut down to nothing. Machines we use are being shipped out. And they give us the shittiest people – currently we have a morbidly obese mofo there who only bathes when we make a complaint. He’s lazy AF and he’s got the personality of a moat – you know the moat was where the castle sewerage went. Before him, there was a psychotic lady. I had to put in a “hostile work environment” complaint to get her the f*** away from me. And that’s the easy part, I’ll get him out, too. But there will be another after him, and another…AAAARRRRRRGGGGGHHHHH.

We already lost a contract with Ford. I think we will lose another.

Everything is in flux there, in a really stupid kind of way. So I asked – in general – how it will come out. (I know everything up to this has been bitch-gripe-grumble-fuck. But the background is relevant to the cards.)

Again – Birds – Cat – Mice _ Fish – Ship

The Ensslin is not a regular Lenormand> When I first got it, I was inclined to substitute Cross meanings for Cat, but Jon St, Germain tells me that he uses it for nosiness and interference, and that works for me. (LOL, CATS.)

Stress and hecticness and gossip combined with nosiness leads to financial loss. A lot of talking and movement, but the shipment (or two, or more) is not made. Decision makers are dropping the ball in a big way. A lot of intrigue and talking and yammering, but no substance. Playing at work. Birds reflecting Ship, stress over a shipment (that should just HAPPEN, in a sane world. What is so hard about building shit, packing it, and shipping it out? I mean, if you have the machines to do that. Which we did – BEFORE THEY GOT RID OF THEM.), Cat + Ship, they have their nose in it (the shipment) but it’s all wrong. Mice take Cat (“SHUT UP”) but they shit on Fish (money).

WHY?

Magician – Moon – Fool

Magician is a trickster. Sleight of hand, con games. The people at the top are losing for a reason – tax writeoff? IDK, but it’s intentional. The Moon, things are lit dimly, people get away with things in the shadows. (Goddamn weasels.) The Fool is an utter ass who thinks he knows it all – watch out for that croc, dude.

Synthesis: The ass is leading the head, like some kind of backwards snake. Failure in 3…2…

Mr. Dreidel says “do nothing”. So I will shut up and keep plugging.

*211th Chorus

The wheel of the quivering meat
conception
Turns in the void expelling human beings,
Pigs, turtles, frogs, insects, nits,
Mice, lice, lizards, rats, roan
Racinghorses, poxy bucolic pigtics,
Horrible unnameable lice of vultures,
Murderous attacking dog-armies
Of Africa, Rhinos roaming in the
jungle,
Vast boars and huge gigantic bull
Elephants, rams, eagles, condors,
Pones and Porcupines and Pills-
All the endless conception of living
beings
Gnashing everywhere in Consciousness
Throughout the ten directions of space
Occupying all the quarters in & out,
From supermicroscopic no-bug
To huge Galaxy Lightyear Bowell
Illuminating the sky of one Mind-

Poor!
I wish I was free
of that slaving meat wheel
and safe in heaven dead.
Jack Kerouac

GOBSMACKED! The Ensslin, Schaiblin/Reutlingen Lenormand

The deck is a little wonky, but profoundly stunning. It’s easily one of the most aesthetically pleasing Lenormands I’ve ever seen (and I’ve seen scads!) Is it one of those pretty but unreadable things? Not at all. Let me explain:

The numbering is not standard. That’s not an issue for most of us.

There is no Cross card, but there is a Cat card. Since Cat meanings in cartomancy are identical to Fox meanings, having a Cat in the deck is like having two Fox cards. So, for myself, I use Cross meanings. Why? It balances the deck, and “full stop, burdens, suffering, illness” fits the ferals we see every day.
(YES, my town needs TNR.) That’s my take. Do as you see fit.

Perfectly round insets, crazy sigils, lovely linework and tints. Feast your eyes a bit.

The Esslin is available HERE

And while we’re on the subject, Lauren is talking about doing a Wirth. A good, working, no glitter one! Put me down for several copies – imagine a side of these Wirth majors with your Lenormand! ❤

The Rana George Lenormand

This one arrived on the morning of July 3rd, after being on preorder for some time. It is, as expected, wonderful. It is well thought-out. Callie French’s art is beautifully done. The cards have shiny gold detailing and a subtle shimmer all over – not glittery or glitzy, just the barest whisper of sparkle. The stock is sturdy. The booklet is substantial, and the box is one of those nice magnetic closure ones. No surprises here.

What surprised me is how affecting the whole thing is. You don’t get the full impact in photos or videos. This thing shimmers, it pulls you in, everything else kind of drops off and there’s just the cards, and this incredible lush world that doesn’t exist the same way anymore. (Check out the photo essay at Beautiful Beirut before Bombed-Out Buildings were part of the Scenery) Yet even knowing what happened, the deck manages not to be depressing. “La Dolce Vita in the Middle East” is too vibrant for that.

There are six extra cards included, total. There are extra Man and Woman cards, both in the old style and a more contemporary look. There are also the four shown at the bottom of this photo, Spirit, Incense, Bed, and Market:

Those four are cards that Rana – a top tier, seasoned reader – had actually been wishing were in a Lenormand deck for some time, they’re not innovation for innovation’s sake. And they work – having a Spirit card, for example, is much easier than having to pick that kind of information out of combos. And the Bed card! As Madame Nadia said earlier today, “The “Bed” is everything. It’s such a classic cartomantic move.” I agree. It can work like Kurze Krankheit in Kippers, but it’s MUCH more inviting! 😀 The 8×5 is going to be A Thing. Watch. 😉

I wish I had the writing chops to express how superb this deck really is, but I don’t. Just experience it for yourself. You can order the Rana George Lenormand HERE.